Release The Mind

We may not be organized people. Getting our schedules straight can be difficult. Our minds crave organization. Healthy minds must be able to prioritize thoughts and feelings. Our actions must make sense, if not to others, then at least to ourselves. For this reason we often perform many tasks by rote. How often do you think about your mental habits? The things we do may not bring us pleasure yet we do what has become natural. It is time to unshackle the mind and free ourselves from behavior that serves no good purpose.

Behaviors are learned over time. As children we are taught simple tasks to perform as well as what activities will hurt us. As we grow we repeat behaviors we develop through learning, imitation and adaptation. We do things we hope will provide us desired results. We grow and change yet our reasons for what we do stay the same. We give little thought to how we actually feel as we accomplish daily tasks.

There are some simple reasons for our habitual actions. Let me offer some examples to put this into perspective. A floor is cleaned in the same way our mothers taught us. They may not have explained why, or even if there might be, a less laborious method. We balance our checkbook using monthly statements sent in the mail. It is a task that causes stress. We could more easily balance it via a computer application. We do not as we are more comfortable with our older method despite the mental anguish it brings.

There is an old saying: The devil you know is better than the devil you do not. Okay, I am paraphrasing a bit. What this means is that fear keeps us doing and being who we are because the alternative may be even worse. We become too comfortable. Our behaviors and ways of thinking do not change because they are familiar and easier than the work it would take to change them. Believe it or not it takes less work than you realize.

For many years I had organized my time in much the same way. As soon as I noticed something amiss I felt that I had to handle it immediately. When a plate was used it must then be washed. When mail arrives it must be read and sorted. Each behavior had to be done in precisely the same order each and every day. I felt so constricted. I finally realized that I could group similar tasks together. I could also perform them when it worked best for me. I was so used to doing things the way I always had that I was blind to the stress and pain it caused me.

I told myself that I am an adult. No matter how I had been taught how to do things I was the boss. Regardless of how others might criticize me I make my own rules. I had to decide what worked best for me. How could I reduce my stress and increase my happiness? We are brought up with a sense of right and wrong. It is a strong influence on our behaviors. I now see that I decide what is right and wrong for me and my life. As long as I am not hurting anyone else I can do whatever I want however I want.

We never forget all of the advice we receive. Unconstructive criticism stays with us. The voices from our past cannot be allowed to negatively influence who we are today. We are mature individuals. Who else should decide what is best for us? We alone create our life's goals and deserve credit for our success. If we fail we must be good to ourselves. Learning from mistakes and moving on to try again is the mark of wisdom. Let no one else judge you when you do not live up to their standards. Your expectations of yourself is the only yardstick you need.

My advice is true for small daily tasks and larger life decisions. How we see ourselves matters more than anything else. When we change from what is comfortable to what is new, be it chores or major life changes, pain is involved. Do not let that pain stop you from making your life better. Self-nurturing and self-love are the keys to happiness. Listen to your heart and be honest with yourself. Be released from old habits and defeating behaviors and discover the better life that awaits you!